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Spects start off nervous about not playing well. They need support to feel more assured. When they do something (even something small) it helps to reward them. Spects tend to repeat behaviors that get rewarded. The reward is known as a stroke.
If there’s something to be done, let the spect be the one to do it. This puts the spect in the driver’s seat instead of making them a passenger along for the ride.
When you allow room for spects to contribute, sometimes you need to wait. How you wait can affect whether or not they respond. Just waiting is flat and lifeless, and less likely to elicit a response. On the other hand, waiting with expectation helps draw out spects’ responses. Assume that they have a contribution to make, and wait with anticipation for it to show up. Sometimes it just takes a little longer than you expect. Expectation, coupled with good eye contact, turns dead air into a pregnant pause before spects put their ideas into play.